The dreaded Winter lurg has hit my house, fortunately at the moment it has only affected me (do you like how I say 'fortunately only me'... it's better than the alternative) and now E. Saturday night I started to feel a bit off and then it knocked me on my backside. 'Twas not fun.
So last night E starts to look a bit peaky... A bit pale, feels a bit warm. You know what's coming. I know what's coming. First she throws up all over herself whilst sitting on my lap in the computer room, most of it goes over herself and the kitchen floor (and I would have got her out quicker if A hadn't been stood in the way going "EEEWW!"... Yes, helpful, now move).
Later on, E & I are laying on the (new) sofa together, she's snuggled up on my lap under a blanket and about to doze off... It happens in a split second, I hear the gush in her tummy before she sits up & looks at me, then projectile vomits... All. Over. Me.
At this point I am now holding her to me along with the blanket so that she is only sick on me. I shout HEELLLLPPPPP to the Mister who doesn't even need to ask, and comes running in with towels. E is still vomiting (all over me), and I am squeezing my legs together because I can feel it pooling in my lap & starting to run down my leggings. "PUT A TOWEL UNDER ME!" I scream at the Mister, "FOR GOD'S SAKE DON'T LET IT GO ON THE SOFA!". He duly stuffs a towel under me and holds one under E's chin at the same time.
After what felt like hours it was finally over. I had to roll off the sofa still holding her against my chest, she had hardly any on her because I deflected most of it on to myself and the blanket & towels. I was literally soaked down to my PANTS in sick. I was also wearing a dress which I then had to pull off over my head.
Teen thought that this was disgusting, which it of course was. I told her though, one day when she has her own place & children of her own... Even if it means catching vomit in your hands, your handbag or your lap, you will ALWAYS save the sofa.